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Change is Coming

October 5th, 2009 at 10:35 am

Mr. H let me know a few weeks ago about two changes coming at his work.

These changes are no surprise to me. About a year ago I figured that the business he works for would probably close in 10 years or less. They have lost clients over the years without adding any new clients, and his boss, the business owner, is about 55. If the business closed then it would leave Mr H out of a job at 55 or so. I have urged Mr. H to look for a new job. He reads Craig's List. He doesn't apply for jobs, talk to people or companies that have jobs, or develop new skills.

Mr. H does not deal well with change.

My current plan is to get back into the work force full time in about eight to ten years. I also have thought that I'd probably approach this incrementally - very part time, then part time, then more hours and so on up to full time and beyond. I'm not relishing the the thought of working full time plus at that point in my life, but with Mr. H at my side I think my options are limited. I haven't been successful in getting him on board the "do what it takes to save for old age" train, and he is not going to work any more (or any harder) than he already does. I'm only willing to let this situation go on for so long - *I'll* do what it takes to save for old age. I could write volumes on how frustrating it is to have a partner tell you that they want the same things as you, and then not be willing to take the actions necessary to get those things. We have been down this road many times.

In my snarkier moments I figure that, once this job is gone, I'll be supporting us because Mr H "can't" find a job. (Says the woman who is not working outside the home now, and hasn't looked for a job since 1992. I might be veering into over confidence.) I say this because I know Mr. H, I'm not going to let myself starve, and I have known several women who ended up in this position. Two of these women are part of my extended family.

At any rate, these two very significant changes at Mr. H's work - one definite before the end of the year, one looking more and more likely every day - may accelerate my time table a bit. If Mr. H's job lasted for another 8 or so years, that would work for MY time table - Daisy will be an adult. I'm going to keep tabs on this situation but I may have to start looking at the "very part time" work option now.

6 Responses to “Change is Coming”

  1. creditcardfree Says:

    Good luck!!

  2. gamecock43 Says:

    I am glad you wrote this- Mr H sounds like my husband BB. Doesnt see the whole picture, doesnt panic like I panic, and does not do much to make himself more employable.

  3. homebody Says:

    Maybe we can cowrite the book. However, I have to say in the past few years (DH just turned 51) he is getting more and more on board with the changes needed.

  4. frugaltexan75 Says:

    I hope you're able to find a job if/when that becomes necessary.

  5. baselle Says:

    Again, its very much a man's recession - women seem to be keeping their jobs, men losing theirs.

  6. Petunia Says:

    A tardy thanks to everyone for your support! baselle - I hadn't heard that. So far the impact of the recession has been minimal on us, and for that I am very thankful. homebody - "cowrite the book" ha ha ha ha! Laughing with you. I guess I have about 5 years then before Mr H gets with the program.

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